Maddi: 'I really struggle with harnessing my emotions. I guess my conclusion was that if I addressed my feelings on my blog, maybe even I would start to understand them.''
If I had to search for the definition of Maddi McFarland on the Internet it would be REALNESS in all its purest form. The time stops when you read her blog, and you keep posing and posing and posing and reflecting and nodding. This centred soul blogger pours her emotions raw as it comes, her honesty is her testimonial and this is an amazing weapon to change the world. One can connect with anyone who is honest. Who would disagree? She is a palette of watercolour splashed on a brand new canvas and she draws her art according to her own pulse.
My favourite part of blogging is not the looks, style, up to date makeup. It’s all about the person behind the screen. Navigating from words to words, sometimes you pause because it struck you and you wonder, you don't feel alone and you are happy. All these alternate mixed emotions are the reason I read blogs and not to say the least Maddi's platform delivers a true reflection of her soul.
What are the things you are grateful for?
I am most grateful for the people who have helped me continue to do the things I feel compelled to do. I’m grateful to Mother Nature and her mysterious beauty. I’m grateful for artists who make me feel less alone.
Maddi or how would you like me/us to call you? Madison? wink eye. Words are truly a way of evasion, a gift given to us to express some hidden masterpiece unlock in our pained heart. It's the key to liberation, it's the cries of sleepless nights. Words are more than words, it's the rhythm the soul pours out to create a story true to us but true to others in their own way. Just like the Feminine Mystique that has ignited the spark within desperate women to voice out their feelings whether it was about injustice, desperation and so forth. My blog, your blog, anyone's work of self-expression has a stone in history and can inspire others. As an artist, a writer, a friend, a daughter, what words would you like to convey to us right now?
I believe that marginalized people carry an immense amount of pain. Sometimes this burden affects us physically, emotionally, or mentally. All logistics aside, us humans do not distinguish the difference. Pain is the pain, ultimately we have no way to gauge exactly what or how others are experiencing their walk on earth.
she says: '' There has been so much hostility on every platform of our existence with the social and political crisis we are currently in that it makes me physically ill to think about.''
As a citizen of this world, what are the issues that worry you the most?
We focus on that which we are scared of instead of what we love. We are all afraid. How we act on that fear is the focus of all world issues, good and bad.
Maddi: '' When I was little I was ostracized by the other girls because I didn't believe in the same things or play the same way they did.''
We've all been kids, we've all known kids, they are cute yet sometimes they impersonate a concept that is by no means acceptable. They reflect what society does best, rejection. In society, If you think, act, look or speak differently you become an outcast. Being shunned for having a trait of character that celebrates our uniqueness is quite a dehumanizing experience which can either break us or make us grow. Given the silent treatment engenders self-incrimination which is a ghastly form of hurt, sealed with an exclusion label.
Whenever our hearts are longing, scream or endure pain there is confinement of the soul. What lessons did you cultivate from this whole experience?
Recently, I have been studying the art of solitude. I am a very social creature which conflicts with my ability to create. Sometimes, it is necessary to draw into oneself to focus and perform authentically. In retrospect, I believed being raised in solitude taught me many lessons up front that I have utilized to develop independent philosophies.
We have a generation growing up with lower self-esteem that doesn't have the coping mechanism to do with stress. With instant gratification, we've become impatient, with the Facebook and Instagram world we've become good at putting filters on things. We're good at showing people how amazing our life is even though we are depressed.
Maddi: ''When I shy away from the Internet it is for the purpose of healing, but I never expected my life to become so washed out.''
In what ways your life became washed out?
Social media is a highlight real. We do not experience the full presence and energy of the soul. For the purpose of mass communication, social media can be to the greatest of advantages in the modern age.
Maddi:'' Sometimes I'll post a picture and girls will comment nice things about my hair, or makeup, etc. They will call me goals, or even say they wish they were me. Here's the thing, I know this is a compliment, but part of me dies every time someone says this. Today it brought me to tears.''
What piece of wrinkle would you give to this generation, highly dependent on social media?
Go lightly. Nothing is permanent. Social media will evolve and so shall we. Use all your tools to your advantage, and do not fear the internet.
Imagine you stumble across a beautifully showcased dress in a shop, the display, the light, the atmosphere all these little subtle details instill in your mind an urge to possess it. Now that it's yours, your first impression changes, it doesn't fit, you don't feel at ease. Your feelings buried under a layer of silk. It was not what you needed but only what you wanted.
This is how life is, sometimes the evil comes in disguise.
What is your hierarchy of needs?
Self-care is my base for needs, you can’t take care of anyone else if you can’t take care of yourself. My family and loved ones are my next priority. I want to be a catalyst for health and change for the people around me, this is my passion. Without this ability to help others I am nothing.
Maddi:''...but the issue with people who rely on your energy is that they attach themselves to you like tubes in your chest.''
On your blog, you’ve said that you make friends easily but you are constantly driven to reinvent yourself with every relationship. We've all had this friend or these friends who is/are toxic. We feel drained, depleted when we are in their presence. What's your bird's eye view of ways to deal with bucket dippers?
You have to literally stop, envision these ties and in your mind's eye cut them. Do this as many times as you need. Buddha practised the ancient art of Reiki for free until he realized that the same people were coming back each time to be healed. Some people choose not to help themselves and it is not your job to take care of those who do not take responsibility for their own well being.
Maddi: ''Along with deleting hundreds of irrelevant relationships from social media. I detoxed my music and television. Even the clothing I wear now is less ignorant.''
What was the motivation factor that inspired you to these changes and how would you describe your new philosophy to life?
I cannot take full credit for this idea. I had reached out to a spiritual healer for guidance after some serious health complications. For me, my internal self-causes ailments in my physical form. This is true for many people. She had suggested that I cleanse all unauthentic influences from my life. Anything that I felt brought me to a place of self-doubt I banished.
The voyage that leads to our destiny is full of barriers to entry that waits to be faced with and as a consequence transcend. Our capacity to voluntarily accept the restricted and painful conditions of our life's journey determines the magnitude of power we associate to it. To bear the burden of being without becoming corrupt, it is Important that we find ways to reinforce our strength as individuals. Maddi, you've always been transparent concerning your health issues. Your struggle with Crohn disease for almost a decade is exemplary. While reading your blog, I felt your deep energy and realized how your health played a drastic role in the person you've become.
What is the most difficult part when dealing with health problems?
In the past, I feared people would find out that there was something, anything wrong with me. I had wrapped myself up in a world of perfectionism that I lost my own identity. I was also dealing with several controlling egos that wanted to take health choices into their own hands. I had to learn to decipher and communicate with others as efficiently as possible so that I might receive the treatment I wanted and deserved. It is imperative to be upfront and honest with your care providers. Do your research so you know the language of modern medicine. If you wish to practice holistically, remember that sometimes this alone is not enough and forgive your body!
As humans, we are a sponge of emotions. What advice would you share with someone dealing with health issues, how to move forward?
We all feel bad for ourselves sometimes. Do not get trapped in the what if’s. You were given these circumstances for the benefit of your own spiritual growth. Overcome and you will find your reward.
On your blog, you showcase a wide range of looks and your aesthetic reflects your uniqueness. How would you define your style and what is your approach to fashion?
Colour harmony is sacred to me. If I let my hair fade it is usually a reflection of how I feel on the inside. The same can be said for the outfits that I curate. This is how I feel, so this is what I will wear.
You share a special relationship with your hair ;) blue, purple, pink, henceforth. It's your tool of expression.
What do you like the most about changing your hairstyle?
I feel like a giant mood ring sometimes. It is interesting for me to see how my hair colour and style affects others, as well.
Finally, during an Interview with The Telegraph, you've shared how your Grandma taught you how to sew and how both of you shared a love for "Project Runway". It seems that your grandmother has had an impact on your career.
What are the most important values you've learned from her?
My grandmother is my Indigo guide. I was given to her, and she to me. We help each other find our way on Earth. She is like the sun to me. I would not have survived without her. I have learned to live from this woman, a selfless Aquarius. She taught me how to create. She created a safe place for me to express my individuality. She taught me the value of my god given right, and to love my body regardless of flaws. She taught me to heal, guard, and love myself and others. She encouraged me to push myself, but always be understanding when I fail. I spoke to her today and she told me that she put red roses on my grandfather’s grave for father’s day. Her world never revolved around her, she is the ultimate earth angel. Most importantly, she keeps me grounded. She buys me tokens of the sea turtle to remind me to slow down.
Where you can connect with Maddi:
Blog: not available anymore
Thanks for reading and always remember the power of someone else story is worth all the grain of sand along the shoreline.
(Repost: This interview was published on my blog on the 28th Sep 2018)